A Prayer for All of the Above

 She sat down and prayed...

Lord,

I’m choosing to come to you right now. Not that I feel like it. Half of me feels like throwing up my hands and giving into selfish escapes (Facebook, Pinterest, Netflix, eating sweets, a nap). But You already know all of my favorite ones.  

The other half of me feels like putting my head down and charging ahead trying frantically to get the to-do list checked off. Knowing secretly, it’s impossible. And that I’ll make everyone around me miserable.

Didn’t I just throw a bunch of toys off the couch just to find a place to sit! How does the house fall apart so quickly? The kitchen sink is overflowing with dishes and the day isn’t even over. The playroom is a disaster. I’d pick it all up to feel better but then I think I’m teaching my kids nothing when I do their work for them. No bed in the house is made. I have no idea what I’m cooking for dinner and I think there is still food out from lunch. I could go on about folding the heap of laundry and finishing my Bible study for tomorrow.  And I can just see the day steaming rolling ahead with school pick-up, kid’s homework, dinner, followed by basketball practice and then a Park Board meeting tonight. It’s CRAZY!   

But I’m choosing to sit here and share my frazzled heart with you. Knowing that escapes won’t bring me peace. Knowing that even a clean house and the to-do list completed won’t bring me peace. Well maybe momentary peace but not the peace my thirsty soul craves.

So I lay this tangled mess before you. The ordinary messes of life that every women faces. Juggling all the responsibilities while trying not to look like a complete fool.  

Remind me of your truth. 

“I leave you peace. It is my own peace I give you. I give you peace in a different way than the world does. So don’t be troubled...” (John 14:27)

It’s not what I do or don’t accomplish today.  It’s not even who I am - frazzled or put-together. Those things will come and go like the tide in the ocean. But one thing doesn't change.  

I am yours.

I am your daughter.

I am loved.

And You say nothing can change that (John 1:12).

Thank you Lord for this truth.  Not that it cleans up the mess around me but is cleans up the mess in my heart.  

Help me to walk in this truth the rest of the day - whatever it holds.

Amen

She got up. Renewed and started with the dishes.

Still Seeking Him

It’s Christmas. It came again. Like it has every year. Am I ready? Not ready with my “to do list,” but ready in my heart.  

We can spend all of our time getting ready for Christmas that we miss it in our hearts.  

We spend our time decorating, buying gifts, wrapping gifts, grocery shopping, baking, sending out Christmas cards, attending parties, planning fun outings with family.  Which are all great things and I look forward to these things each year.  We can become so focused on these outward activities that our hearts are left feeling frazzled and empty.  And we whisper the words in our hearts, “I’m ready for all of this to be over.” 

There were plenty of people that missed Christ’s birth in Bethlehem all those years ago.  Who were those that were ready? They were the wise men and the shepherds. Two of the most unlikely groups of people.  

The wise men knew about the promised king from the scripture. And when they saw the star they went. The traveled with gifts seeking out the promised King and when they arrived they worshiped him. (Numbers 24:17, Matthew 2:1)

The shepherds were going about their daily night shift.  When they were unexpectedly told by the angels of the King’s birth. So they went. They sought out the baby King and worshiped him. (Luke 2:8-14)

Yet there were likely hundreds of visitors in Bethlehem. There were no rooms available for Mary and Joseph to stay the night of Jesus birth. All those people and yet it was the wise men and shepherds who celebrated His birth that night. (Luke 2:6)

I want my heart to be ready today to receive King Jesus.  

Thought I’ve spend much of this December distracted and frenzied by checking off my to do list, I don’t want to miss what it’s all really about. It’s never to late to stop and seek Jesus just like the wise men and shepherds did so long ago.  

Today we don’t have to be distracted. Today we don’t have to be frenzied.

Today our hearts can be filled with all the JOY of celebrating his Birth. 
It is not to late to stop. We can still seek Him and savor Christ birth. 

When I Feel Like This...

I’ve been feeling like I’m a hamster running in a wheel. Round and round I run. Fast. With what seems like no destination.

Another mess to clean.

Another diaper to change.

Another meal to cook.

Another load of laundry.

Another trip to the store.

Over and over again. Never making any progress.   

But I began to meditate on this verse.

And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith

Hebrews 12:1b-2a

My feelings often cloud the truth. I am running, but not in a wheel. I’m running in a race. It is the race that God has set before me. He has planned this part of the course. He knows the terrain I run right now. It is paved with messes, dishes, diapers, cooking, laundry, errands, and all the demands of littles. And it is a long stretch of the same things every day.

But I’m spending to much time looking at the terrain and not enough time looking at Jesus.  

Although I’m out of practice, I love to run and I love to race. When I’m in the race I notice the road but it is not what is fixed in my mind. While I’m running I’m fixing my eyes on the finish line. That’s why I can keep my pace. I know there is a finish. As my feet pound the road, I’m making progress.  

That’s the point of this verse in Hebrews.  We can run with endurance because we keep looking at Jesus.  

As I look toward Him I remember. I remember He began my journey. I remember that He is perfecting my faith.   

As I look toward Him I’m thankful. Thankful that He holds my heart and at the finish line I’ll run into His arms. I’m thankful, although the terrain around me is not changing, He is changing me into His likeness. I’m thankful that He can help me run well right now.  

So last night as I wiped up yet another glass of spilled something and began the bedtime routine with my fussy littles, I silently prayed.

Lord, I’m running in this race. It’s hard. I’m tired. But I know I'm running the race You have for me. I know You are perfecting me even in this. I know You’ll give me Your strength to run well.  Amen. 

Be encouraged friend. Jesus know the race you run. You run in a race not a hamster wheel.  

Crafting for Fall

Crisp cool air, round pumpkins, hot cider, changing leaves...I love fall! I always look forward to making my home look ready for fall too. Here are a few of the crafts I've been adding to our home.

This small Harvest banner is strung in our dinning room.  I made it of burlap, scrap fabric and twine.  I used fusible interfacing to add the letters.

I love this little pumpkin patch. I clipped branches off our three to make the stems, added floral wire for the vines and felt leaves.  The Pumpkin is simply gathered fabric and filled with Poly-Fill.  Check out this link for an easy tutorial.

Thank you Pinterest for free printable from other creative gals! Click here. I had my hubby cut out a piece of MDF board for me and then I just decoupaged the printable onto the board. Simple and looks great on our mantel.

This was probably my favorite project and it didn't cost anything since I used scrap fabric. After sewing a long rectangular pocket, I painted on these words with black fabric paint.  Then I just stuffed it with Poly-Fill and sewed closed. 

What have you been crafting up this fall? 

Happy crafting!

If I'd Known as a New Mom...

It’s amazing how you do not have to show a little girl how to “play” with a doll. They instinctively know. So, for many of us, when we found out we were going to be called “Mommy,” our hearts soared with anticipation and sweet dreams of our little one. 

Once my daughter arrived, I was thrust into mommyhood and it was nothing like I thought it would be. I pictured myself as something of a mix between a 1950’s ‘Leave it to Beaver’ mom and modern super-mom who could do it all well in heels and skinny jeans. That was totally NOT reality. Reality was...I sat around nursing my daughter in my pajamas watching ER reruns! And though I soon found out how to get a shower, I still battled my idealism of motherhood with reality. Looking back, I wish another mom would have sat me down and given me a different picture. So this is what I’m passing on to you...ten things I wish I’d known when I became a new mom.

1) Don’t be afraid to ask other moms.

For one thing, you’ll feel so encouraged that you are not alone! Other mamas feel the same way. Second, other moms really have great insights to share. Ask questions and listen. You may not be able to use everything they say, but you’ll be surprised at how much you learn. Though I’ve read some great books, most of what I’ve learned about being a loving and nurturing mom has been from other seasoned mamas. Titus 2:3-4

2) You are not a “bad” mom. 

Ugh! How many times I have felt like this! Many of us feel this way because we judge ourselves based on an unrealistic expectation of motherhood.  When we fall short, we sink into despair and feel as though we are going to ruin our child. But this is the wrong way to look at being a mom. We are all sinners, But God is righteous. With the Holy Spirit, I can trust God to work His Righteousness through me. The truth is...you are not a perfect mom. You will fail. A good mom is one who loves her child and does her best in the midst of her own imperfections and allows God to do the rest. Philippians 3:9

3) Start home management habits now. 

It was not until I had my second child and was preparing for our third that I started learning how to be a productive home manager. I knew that what I was currently doing wasn’t working. And, honestly, I was a bit lazy too. I would just put off cleaning instead of being disciplined to get it done when I had the time. I knew how to cook. I knew how to clean. But I didn’t have a plan or a system. So start now by making a plan of how you are going to care for your home. Sit down and write it out. Start the discipline of doing it and not putting it off. Don’t wait until you have three kids tugging at your legs. Proverbs 31:27  

4) Don’t be so quick to judge other moms. 

I confess, I’ve done it! And I did it a whole bunch when I had only one little. Yep, I’m talking about that look. The glance you give the other mom in the grocery store when her child is acting up. I’m talking about those things you may whisper to other girlfriends or spouse, “I’m never going to let my child...” You can fill it in. Don’t be so quick to judge. Can I be honest with you? You really don’t know it all when you start out as a new mom. And that’s okay. You are not supposed to! No mom does. Being a mom is a journey and we all start at the beginning. So choose to give a smile of grace rather than a glance of judgment. Matthew 7:1-5 

5) Find your mommyology.

Yep, that’s right. Learning to be a great mom is a process. You are the perfect mom for your child. There is only one you. Find out what works best for you, and embrace it! There are lots of different ways to be a great mom. Don’t stress out when you aren’t like the mom you see at the park or across the street. They are not you and you are not them. There are no cookie cutter moms. 1 Corinthians 12:16  

6) Play to your strengths. 

It was really freeing to me when I started to play to my strengths. You have gifts and talents and you also have weaknesses. So capitalize in your strengths. I love parties, crafting, and cooking, so I try to spend my time with my daughters in these ways. Your child is going to remember the special things that make you you. So play those up those strengths.

1 Corinthians 12:17

7) Find what fills your tank. 

There are so many things that empty us as moms. (No sleep, messes everywhere, tantrums, laundry, diapers, potty training, dishes, errands, bills, the to-do list...) So you have to know what really fills your tank up. Be specific: write them down and share them with a friend or spouse who can encourage you to find some “me time” when you are feeling depleted. Mark 1:35-37

8) Most worries are pretty minor.

As moms, we worry. I don’t know a mom who hasn’t. But most things that we worry about are pretty minor. It’s easy to lose sight of the big picture. Oh, the things I got worked up about with my first daughter!  Was she getting enough milk when I nursed? Was she keeping up with other babies her age? And, even now, I catch myself making a big deal out of something that really is not. Worry is not helpful and, in fact, it only make things worse. Prayer is powerful and it brings the peace our hearts need. Philippians 4:6-7 

9) Give yourself grace. 

Your house is not going to always be clean. You are going to be late sometimes. You are going to forget things, and there will be days your kid's hair is not brushed or even their teeth! You are not always going to provide the healthiest meals. You are going to get angry and yell and say things you wish you hadn’t. We are human and we are sinners. And we need to give ourselves grace when we mess up. We need to remember that God--who loves us even more than we love our littles--can use our messes and our successes for His good purposes. 2 Corinthians 12:9  

10) Choose to be Spirit-led.

I’m amazed at how many little decisions I make every day as I care for my girls. What they will eat, how I’ll discipline them, where they can go and what they can do. I’m also amazed at how I can leave Jesus out of the equation. Yet He longs to help me and give me the wisdom I need.  All it takes is a pause, a whispered prayer, and to listen. When I stop and let the Lord lead me as I parent, I’m amazed at the peace in my own heart and the spiritual fruit I see in my child’s. Your child is not to little to start asking Jesus to be your guide.

James 1:5

Seahawk Love!

I don't think I have ever had my hubby thank me for putting up decorations.  That is until now.  Here is what I pulled together to cheer on our Hawks.

 

These pics are of our mantel. To make the sign, I stenciled on 12 and then painted with acrylics. I sanded it down a bit to get that worn look and then applied a light stain to finish it off. Inside the photo frame is just craft paper with a printed logo off the web! The garland is made of felt strips about 2 inches long. I simply sewed them together. 

This pillow cover I pulled together with left over denim fabric and appliqued a 12 on the front with a bright lime green polka-a-dot fabric. This is in our front entryway.

 

The garland I made with one inch strips of felt - lime green, blue, and gray.  The is a bit labor intensive.  It uses a lot of felt for just a small project.   It easy though, just thread all in pieces together in a alternating pattern with embroidery thread. 

Since football season is so long, my hubby thinks these decorations can stay up till January! 

Late on the Second Day

It was only the second day of school and I was late. I took the walk of shame, passing all the other moms who were on time and now chatting happily as I walk by with my first grader and two littles in tow. That sinking feeling of failure pulling me down. I signed her in and joked that somebody had to be late today.

It was hard to shake it off and still now I don’t know if I completely have.  

I have this perfect picture of how things should go in the morning.  You know this list maybe. Yours is plus or minus a few.

Kids neatly dressed

Healthy breakfast eaten

School lunch packed

Me dressed (at least not showing up in my pjs)

Teeth brushed

Hair done

Beds made

Breakfast cleaned up

Morning Bible story read

Prayers said

No nagging kids

Everything pleasant...peaceful

and of course

On time...

And when it does not go like this - or even if I come close but fall short by one or two - I am so quick to sink into the despair of my perceived failures.  

What’s crazy is I would never beat up another mom for having a morning of missed expectations. Yet, I can’t give myself that same grace.   

Why?

Because I forget. I forget the promise of these words.  

“My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.”

Jesus gave these words to Paul when he was bemoaning his own weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9), as I was this morning.

Grace. (Not the kind we say before dinner.) This grace is God’s favor. It’s His free gift of salvation to all who believe. We didn’t deserve it or earn it. Yet it’s given freely.  It’s “I’m perfectly loved and perfectly accepted.”    

And, yes, His grace is really all I need.

That list of expectations never will leave me with a heart full of peace. We can always find a way we fall short. 

Yes, I’m weak. Yeah, I don’t like saying it -- but it’s for real.

But that’s where God’s promise works best: in my weakness. That’s where His power works best because I stop living from a place of earning and start living from a place of “I already have.” I already have His love, His forgiveness, His favor, His grace.  And that is all I need.

His Grace + My Weakness = His Power Revealed

Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. 2 Corinthians 12:9 NLT

She Just Needed a Rest...

There comes a moment when you just know that all your child needs is a nap.  That happened recently with my littlest, she is almost two.  

The meltdown started about 9:00 in the morning.  Back and forth she went between tantrums or wanting to be held.  About an hour into this, I knew, what she was ready for a nap even through her normal nap time is not until after lunch.  

I headed to the nursery and got her settled into my lap with pacy and blankey.  It was quiet. It was dark. (Thankfully her two big sister were playing sweetly at this moment!)   As I sang and rocked, I could feel her little body begin to relax.  Yes rest would come. It was time.

And I prayed...

This past few months have been very difficult.  I’ve been overwhelmed with just even the normal routines of life.  My hubby took a new position at work recently and has been gone more.  The three kids are still little.  That baby, now almost two, is BUSY.  Those are the obvious challenges, but it’s bigger than just the obvious.  Honestly, “I just can’t handle any more.”  And in my pride, I hate admitting that.  

“Lord what do you have for me right now?”

Tears sting my eyes.  

“I am just so overwhelmed. The busy fall schedule is coming and there are things to say yes to.”

 

And in the quiet moment the Lord whispered to my heart.

“It’s time for a rest.”

Yes I need rest - not more - just rest.  My emotions and actions like my sweet toddler’s are saying, “It’s time to rest.”  I’ve been throwing a bit of my own tantrum.   I’ve been harsh with the girls and rude to my hubby.  And just like my sweet toddler it’s now time to rest.

So I made the call to say no to some things.  My heart is filled with peace knowing I’m going to get the rest that I need for this season.  

The world around us tell us don’t stop--don’t rest.  We idolize work.  We are addicted to busy.   

When I called to say no to an opportunity to lead and serve, my friend said, “Sometimes God gives us strength to serve and other times He calls us to rest.”  

For this season I’m choosing a rest.  And I’m hopeful, I know that rest refreshes and strengthens for the coming season ahead.

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.”  Matthew 11:28

Babydoll Party

My little Madie loves baby dolls.  She always has a doll in tow.  So I knew this had to be the theme for her 4th birthday party.

The Decorations
Pink polka-dots with a bit of vintage.  I got the party paper wears at a great discount online site.  I used to make the flower tissue puffs but you can get them in a two pack at hobby lobby for the same price at buying tissue paper.  So its a time saver.  I made the garland from dollies.  Just fold in half and string on baby yarn.  The baby clip art printables I ordered as a download from Esty.  I'm totally doing this again instead of trying to make my own.  I had never made garland with strips of fabric before.  It was cute but a bit time consuming. 

The Eats
I saw the watermelon baby carriage on Pinterest.  It was pretty easy to do if you have done a watermelon basket before.  You just use toothpicks to hold the wheels and handle in place.  I served a simple snack - fruit and animal crackers  (I had not had animal crackers in forever and could not stop eating them myself!)  Cupcakes were from the box - Strawberry.  I used to try homemade but they never seemed to be as good as the box.  Let me know if you have a great recipe! 

The Activities
I set up three stations that the our guest could play at with their baby dolls.  We also decorted "diaper bags" and had a stroller race.

The Favors
I made baby diapers from patterned felt and gave the guest baby doll bottles that said, "You're a doll! Thanks for coming to my party."

It was the sweetest party ever!  Madie loved playing babies with her friends and I loved watching the girls play too.  If you have a daughter who loves playing babies, I would totally recommend this party theme. 

A Heavenly Father for Father’s Day

I made the drive to the most unlikeliest of places to see my dad on Father’s day...in prison.

As I drove up my heart hurt.  Hurt because I didn’t have what every little girl really wants.  A Father that can be her hero.  A Father who is faithful.  A Father who is there.  Though I’ve grieved this many times before, Father’s Day always reminds me of the hurt again.  

Yet in the midst of the hurt, I had hope.  

Hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us. Romans 5:5

Yes I had hope.  Hope because I know my journey is not done yet.  God has been patient with me, as I’ve walked the path of choosing forgiveness.  And He will continue to walk with me.  He never expected my hurt to be healed overnight.  He whispered His Truth over and over again to my hurting heart.  I’m deeply and completely loved! (1 John 4:10)

He is a Father to the fatherless. Psalms 68:5

Yes at times, I feel fatherless.  But I do have a perfect heavenly Father.  One who is my hero.  One who will not fail me.  All earthly father’s will fail.  They are human just like us.  Some seem to fail in our eyes more than others.  If that has been part of your journey my heart hurts right along with yours.  

You received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, “Abba”, Father.  Romans 8:15

So I’m choosing to rejoice today.  Because, though my earthly father has not been what every little girls wants, I have a amazing heavenly Father who is all I could want and so much more.  The best part... you can rejoice too.